Tuesday, November 14

Jekyll and Hyde


The GMs are bowling, the Flyers are sinking, Lost is over until February and the Sixers can't play defense...but I do have some good news. I just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico. (how lame was that joke?!) But honestly, after the GMs are done showcasing their new flower pattern shirts, Gillick can start, hopefully, making us a little more confident about the 2007 season. He recently stated that trades are our best possibility for landing another starter. This is obvious since the pitching market is so freakin thin that its not impossible to think that Vincente Padilla is going to get that 10 million he is seeking. Which, by the way, blows my mind. Rowand is Gillick's best bait and hopefully there are a lot of teams willing to bite. I liked Aaron when he was here but there really is not the strongest need for him in center anymore. Victorino proved in half a year that he has tremendous upside with his speed, arm, age and overall game. We've been hearing the Sox have wanted Rowand back for awhile now. Let us wait and see how much. Now onto the title...


To perfectly describe my feelings on the Soriano banter that won't stop, I had to call on my old buddy and deceased author for over 100 years Robert Louis Stevenson. He told me about a book he once wrote, The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, which is about a doctor who develops an erratic split personality. Dr Jekyll was a mild mannered man but his other side, Mr hyde, was a crazed murderer. Basically they were competely different in every way. My thoughts on Soriano are very similar to Stevenson's story.

The conversation with me:

Red- the pro-soriano me
Blue- the anti-alfonso me

"I want Soriano to be the meat in an Utley/Howard manwiche. I know that those 3 would combine for sickening numbers and would be possibly the best 3-4-5 in the league.
Wrong. I want nothing do with a 7 year deal involving a 31 year old with a FNTC (even though Gillick won't hand one of those out). I don't want to be in this same position with trying to trade him after he underachieves for 5 years then hogs up over 15% of the Phillies salary in 2012.
2012 is so far away and we are trying to compete and win now...right? Why not get the best bat on the market and make the 2007 Phillies an offensive slaughterhouse.
Because his numbers won't be anywhere nearly as good as 2006. He set career numbers in every part of his game and is 31!
So what? 31 isn't nearly as old as someone like Frank Thomas and look at the year he had. Is it not impossible to say Soriano could have a better year considering he would be hitting in a little league CBP and not RFK?
No, it's not impossible but it is very unlikely. Last year was his contract year and he was most likely playing for the salary he is going to recieve this offseason. And his numbers were not the clutchest in baseball. He his .231 with RISP and .197 with RISP/2 outs. He also struck out over 160 times which would make the 2007 Phillies strike out kings. Remember all those times the phils just needed to put the ball in play to move that runner or get that sacrifice run in? Won't happen with all those k's.
Yea but who cares if you strike out 160 times if you are hitting over 40 homeruns and stealing over 40 bases. Also, his defense was shockingly impressive last year with 22 assists. Why wouldn't you want that kind of player?
Once again because of his money. The price for free agents will be very high this year due to the lack of quality and Boras is going to take full advantage of that.
Ok, yes, however think of the numbers Howard will be able to put up this year with Soriano's bat behind him. Howard is in his prime now and it would be a shame to waste these years and watch him sit back and recieve the Bonds-Treatment(not HGH).
Howard hit 58 homers with zero protection. So in 2007 are we going to over pay for another slugger to protect Soriano? Also, switch Utley and Howard's spot in the lineup...and there you have it...Howard's condom all along was right in front of him.
Clever condom remark.
Thank You.
So if not to Soriano, then who? Lee...will command just as much. Drew...HAHAHA. Zito and Schmidt don't want to come here and the best 3rd basemen is already off the market.
Yea, I know but...
But what? Would you rather them thow all their money into the bullpen and watch "Cormier and Worrell pt 2" unfold?
No, but I don't think they....
Should what? Go for it all now? Let me guess...you don't want to overspend?
Exactly and I'm....
Dumb. Look, it is the 21st Century and this is how baseball is. Sure you can win by building a farm system or watch a bunch of average players overachieve. But lets face it, the Phils have no minor league players (thank you Wade) and VERY RARELY overachieve. So why not go for the gold in 07. We are practically there. Why waste Howard and Utley's prime years by ONLY buidling? If we win it all next year, won't 2012 seem like less of a problem?
Yea but Soriano doesn't give them the best chance....
Shut up, yes he does. He brings speed to a flat footed team and something new that will attract fans. Think of this...Burrell in LF, Victorino in Center, Soriano is RF. Cheap upgrade at 3rd and trade Rowand for a 5th pitcher. Use our remaining money to strengthen our bullpen. Contender?
Yes...
So what's the problem?
I....I....
You what?
Don't like you.
You're a homo.
(sits a cries in the corner because I was just manhandled...by myself?)
Victor"




So what the hell just happened? Three things:
-I just went crazy.
-I have carpal-tunnel
-I think I just convinced myself that I want Soriano

.....but I'm still not sure. DUN DUN DUNNN




PS: If nothing else...this picture should make up for the 5 minutes I possibly just wasted of your life

2 comments:

GM-Carson said...

that was funny stuff. i often argue with myself. if we sign soriano i want to keep burrell. i liked your scenario of burrell, soriano, cheap upgrade at 3rd, rowand for 5th starter and spare parts in the bullpen.

BloodStripes said...

I agree. That scenario is a good one.

The 5 minutes was'nt such a waste. Very funny. I think you just convinced me on getting Soriano too. Like everyone else, I'm worried about the length of contract and the dollars associated with it.